What are you willing to do to get the things you want out of life? Your answer should be that you will do whatever it takes to get the things you want in life. Before I go much further, in today’s society the correct thing to put here is that you would be willing to do whatever it takes as long as no one gets hurt. Here is the thing with that. Someone could always get hurt by your actions to varying degrees and you have to stick to your guns.
When I was in grade 10 I remember a girl I wanted to go out with that was paralysed in her decision making because she never wanted to hurt anyone. As a matter of fact, she wouldn’t go out with me on a date. She could not do it because someone she knew, that I had no interest in, liked me as well. I wonder how many things in life that girl passed on simply because she did not want to hurt any one else’s feelings.
On a side note, the funny thing about trying to preemptively not hurt someone’s feelings is that you actually think you know what people are thinking. I can tell you that idea is a slippery slope. Basing your actions on what you think other people want or are feeling can lead to two unhappy people instead of just one most times.
At the best of times, you end up with two happy people. One that is sort of happy and one that is satisfied. If you are lucky. More often than not though, you get a person being led around by their nose and one controlling entity in the relationship. One person will base their actions on what they think the other person wants and not what they want. At this point, the only happiness that can come out of this action is if the second controlling person is happy with the action and the first person feels a sense of doing what was correct.
However, if the second person is not appreciative or approving of the first persons actions then it is a bust. Person number one did something they did not want to and did not even get the pat on the back for it.
Another thing about not wanting to hurt peoples feelings is that is leads you to powerless place in decision making. You lose your lighthouse. Your guiding light in life should come from inside you. In order to feel on purpose and empowered, your actions should always be congruent with your lifetime goals, passions and ambitions. If not, you are just a leaf being blown in the wind and you will hold resentment to the person or things that are keeping your from your true path.
When you do not base your actions on what you are truly feeling, you become a liar. To yourself and to others. Situations like “Do you want to go to the mall?” You answer “yes”. “Do you like this movie?” Again a yes comes out. “Do you love me?” Yes. Yes. Yes…. puke….
How does anyone ever truly know what you are feeling? You are impossible to know. Nobody will ever be able to get close to your true being if you are going to yes your way through everything. Now if you are honest and you do not like this movie and you would rather go to the park, guess what? When you say yes to something important, people will really know you mean it.
“Yes, I do love you.” Now that means something when you always say what you mean and do what you say. Doing whatever it takes to be happy in this life starts with being honest with others and yourself about what you truly want.
LIKE THE DAY I WAS BORN WHEN EVERYTHING WAS AMAZING AND EVERYTHING SURPRISED ME. MORE MOMENTS OF STANDING AWESTRUCK AT WHAT I SEE. NO MORE NUMBNESS. FULL VITALITY. THE WORLD IS CHANGING. CONTROL IS EVERYWHERE. I REBEL AGAINST ALMOST EVERYTHING BECAUSE IT TRIES TO RESTRAIN ME. I MAY NOT BE RIGHT BUT I AM ME AND THAT’S WHAT I AM CALLED TO BE. EVERYTHING HAS ITS PURPOSE AND MINE MAY NOT WORK WITH YOURS. THAT DOESNT MAKE EITHER OF US RIGHT OR WRONG.
I just found out my caps lock key was on. *SIGH*.
Life can be weird and it can also be miraculous. Do I really want to figure it all out? How many things have I learned about that when I understood, the magic was gone. The most outrageous magic is how it all fits together. The rain falls, the grass grows, the cow eats the grass, I eat the cow and then I die.
I guess my main function is grass food.
Speaking of which. Why do people care so much about certain things. I mean, in the end… is the end. Now or later, it all turns out the same. So if something bad happens and you go early. You go early. You’re not going to know the difference. If you do know that you went early then there was nothing to worry about because apparently you just changed. You didn’t die. The problem is that you just can’t except being out of control. You hate the fact that there is something you can’t control.
And there lies the problem. When you seek to control, you are the one being controlled by your own thoughts and actions. You’re so busy ‘trying’ that you miss ‘being‘. And if you aren’t being, then you’re already not living.
Not that it really matters.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it.