Your Not Alone Or Judged And People Do Care

Too Heavy For The GymYou’re Not Alone Or Judged And People Do Care… wow, what’s up with that Ray? A little heavy isn’t it?

Ya… a bit but it’s what people are telling me….

I asked my readers what they hated about thier gyms in an email a while ago and this one turned into a pretty neat conversation.

Hey Ray,
Thanks for asking. Personally I don’t go to the gym for a number of reasons.

I’m too obese to do the 45 minutes arobic class and can’t do push ups – too much weight to fight
against gravity. I can do the plank and hold on my elbows (3 sets of 30 seconds- I’m trying to increase that).

I gained 70 lbs when I got pregnant and I know I can’t use that as an excuse anymore because my son turned 21 this year.

Over the years I’ve lost and gained probably 200 lbs and am now about 90 lbs over weight.

I’ve tried every thing diet wise and lost 30 lbs each time but then motivation flies out the window
and I’m back to where I was with another 5lbs on top of what I’ve lost.

The gym I used to go to was soooooo snobish. Just can’t stand that. Gyms should be for fat people not
skinny ones.

How about a gym for obese people – with exercises that will work and motivate, and friendly staffs that don’t look down on people like me who really want to lose it but our brain wires seem to be stuck and we all want them unstuck. Because really, if you ask any overweight person they don’t like it but need more encouragement than those that don’t need to lose weight. They are people with lots of feelings and not a lot of ego usually.

I liked going to Curves because a lot of large framed women went. I went for about 1 1/2 year but then fell on the ice – pulled my knee apart and haven’t been able to go since. I try to walk three times a week
30-50 minutes and do the small steps like park farther away, take the stairs instead of the elevator.

I also have small weights (1 to 5 lbs) that I use from time to time and stretch cords (I love those).

With that extra weight I can’t run the marathon (even though I’d love to do that-sort of my bucket list wish).

I ordered your commando stuff but way too hard for me. Now, I’m stuck with it.

Enough wining! I want to lose the weight. I want to lose the fat and get fit but I seem to be stuck in dream land and it’s not happening…on the other hand, your website and your newsletters always give me hope. You have a no-nonsense approach that seems to inject words of encouragement – I always feel so pumped when I read what you post.

Anyway, any suggestions? I’m not looking for magical pill or some freakin contortions that only a wet spaghetti can accomplish.

I’m not looking for 12 hours of exercise either- I have a life and a very busy one at that.

Well, I’ve never expressed these emotions to anyone but there you have it.
I feel better!

Glad to be on your mailing list.

(Name Withheld)
PS-I’m not a spring chicken either – 55 or 48US but I feel like 40.

To Which I Answer:
Which commando do you have? The ebook online version or the DVD’s?

I can tell you one thing… if you want to do that program… I can get you doing it.

It’s NOT too hard for you and you are not STUCK with anything in life. You have the power to change anything in degrees appropriate to your dedication and effort to create change.

Tell me what you attempted and what caused you to stop trying and I’ll give you the next step solution.

Have an awesome day,

Hi Ray,

I have the DVD’s.

I can’t do any of the exercises where I need to kneel down on my knees – even in the warm up I can’t do the sit on your knee thing.

I live in an apartment so I don’t have a chin bar and I couldn’t lift my weight up off the floor to start up with. I’ve used the kitchen counter as a push up board and modified hands position to work muscles differently . I know the counter is not coming off the wall.

I’ve made some of my own modifications on the knee exercises but would like to get your feedback on that.

I’ve re-read the info in the binder and noticed that you mention “working our way up” – guess I got overwhelmed with it all.

I can work my way up to some of the exercises which I can do at 1/2 your speed but I guess the idea is to do them, isn’t it.

Looking forward to hearing your feedback.

(Name Withheld)

To Which I Answer:

The whole idea is…

1) Did you attempt to do more than the last time you tried.
2) Did you at least try.

You see the whole thing about fitness is not what you CAN do.

It is about getting better than you ARE.

So if you’ve done nothing at all and then you put in the DVD and only touch your toes 4 times….


… because you have achieved more than you could have before.

What I do in the videos is just to show you what COULD be done…

Not that I expect you to be able to do it RIGHT NOW… or even a year from now.


You see the thing with fitness is that EVERYTHING works to some degree….

So unless what you do could injure you… then it’s a perfect modification/alternative to an exercise
if you find it physically challenging.

Because that’s all you really need on a daily basis. To be physically and mentally challenged.

So if you find you have to mentally push yourself to get yourself to workout…. there is your mental challenge for the day.

Same with the physical movement. If you run into difficulty…. congratulations! Success! You have given yourself room to grow, improve and a REASON TO BE ALIVE.

I totally realized the other day that without obstacles…. we could never have a sense of pride, accomplishment or self satisfaction.

If we never had to work for anything…. THERE WOULD BE NO REASON TO LIVE.

** Watch the video about using the chair and a doorway chinup bar. I show you how to work up to chins over the months.

** Now you know, you don’t have to do the knee thing.

** Great job on the counter for pushups. You can use the wall as well. Eventually, maybe do them on your knees with a BIG pillow under them.

** Start doing the dirty thirty workout to get some blood flow and you don’t even really need to warm up for that one unless you are going light speed. BUT it will get your cardio fitness up and could take you several weeks to even COMPLETE it endurance wise so it’s a great place to get into and work on.

I hope that helps a little?

Listen – I am here to help.

If you want to change your life and conquer challenges that are in front of you….

Everything I know is at your disposal. That is why I have the online coaching and the new Calgary Gym Opening.

(as a matter of fact, I may send out this email to everyone so the can be inspired to improve…. I will remove your name of course 🙂

Have an awesome day,

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4 thoughts on “Your Not Alone Or Judged And People Do Care

  1. Joel Whitehurst

    I am a small-town undertaker. I’m 62, and I have been working out daily for thirty-eight years , and I eat right and take care of myself. I have trained some of my friends, and I have encouraged many others to start working out.
    I agree with your philosophy, but I discovered the truth from the other side, by looking at the folks I bury.
    I realize that “medical science” is capable of extending an absolute minimum-quality life for years and years and years. I bury a lot of terminally flabby old folks who spent the last thirty years of their miserable lives on a sofa or in a doctor’s office or in between the two. Their poor old bodies consist of tissue-thin, surgically-scarred, bruised skin covering billows of adipose tissue traversed by knotted, sclerotic arteries, supported by porous, delicate, osteoporotic skeletons. Their blood is often pink and transparent.
    As deputy coroner, I have carried many large shopping bags full of expensive prescriptions to the morgue with bodies of willing pill-poppers who haven’t walked more than thirty feet in as many years.
    I heartily dislike most doctors. If what I have seen is the best they can do, then they would be far more useful to society as streetsweepers.
    It’s people like you that have it right. A person has to work hard to get and stay in condition, but the benefits are enormous. Anyone who can inspire others to achieve and maintain a superior level of fitness is an asset to this world and a far, far bigger asset to society than eighty percent of the “good” doctors out there.
    I look forward to reading your newsletter.
    (I realize, however, that doctors are, in their own unique way, my biggest supporters….)

  2. Ray Burton

    Wow Joel. That was an awesome comment. Hearing statements from a fellow like you that gets to see the “end result” and how it all finishes for some people… well, really hits home.

    I REALLY appreciate you taking the time to share. Thankyou.

  3. John

    Good advice, Ray – “good on yer”. It says a lot about gyms though .. peopled by “instructors” rather than “trainers” so they are not able or willing to help the overweight and obese more than half the time. Too often I’ve seen gym staff walk by clients clearly poorly executing an exercise and saying nothing, or watching an “instructor” showing a client how to do an exercise .. but all wrong!!
    I feel sorry for the person who wrote in as they should never have been put in such positions, and hope they heed your advice.

    Keep up the good work!


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