The following example provides you with a simple outline of how to get what you want in life. The excepts for the “How To Get What You Want” book by Zig Ziglar are coming. I will update and let you know via the monthly newsletter.
The first example is choosing a job.
How often do we jump from one mental thing to another as soon as our brains hit a wall. After you hit a bunch of walls inside your head and don’t get any answers, you go into distraction mode and flick on the TV for some electronic crack.
You must force yourself into contemplation. You must sit and think. If you don’t, you’ll distract yourself to the day you die and you’ll die in quiet desperation with your dreams still inside you.
How Do You Want To Spend Your Day? You must define it and write it down.
What are some ways you can make money doing it? You’re going to have to think hard about this because depending on your history and experience some options might not be right at the front of your mind even though they exist.
What do I have to do? What needs to be done. List them in order. What’s the smallest step you can take on this to get the flywheel turning?
Deadlines: When you need to get it done by. Some dreams don’t have deadlines. Sometimes deadlines can put a fire under your ass. These are things you need to decide on. Are you motivated towards pleasure or away from pain. Just do what it takes in the way that makes you move.
Tools: What do you have or what can you get your hands on that will make this happen faster and easier? Think leverage. Use the longest lever to get the biggest ideas to happen.
Progress: How are you doing? What needs adjustment? Are you still interested in trying to make this happen?
The above example sort of shows you the who, what, where, when, and how of getting things done or changing areas of your life. I go through this process almost every morning before my brain starts over working and I’m still honest with myself.
You wake up and say “Do I really want to go to work today and flip burgers? Do I really want to do that even though I was just given $500,000? Do I love doing it so much that if I had a grill at home I would invite people over and cook them burgers after work as well?” If you’re answer is yes then awesome. If it is no, then you’re honesty just told you that you have some work to do.
That is the same thing that you have to when setting any goals. Those questions above are exactly what I put into my binder when I am starting a project or need a change. Let me warn you right now. This is something that you do to get you started into the action. This is a T/F stage. This is a phase one/ two thing. But there is a phase three and that is actually taking action on the information you write down.
Don’t get stuck here. Use it to spur you into action. Simply getting it on paper though, will never accomplish anything unless you start checking off the list.
Ready for another big question? Here it is. “If I take this to the hugest conclusion, would I be happy?”
Ask yourself that if you took this to the hugest level would the process and the end goal be something that you would enjoy being in even if all your worldly needs and material possessions were met. In other words, if you had everything that money could buy, would you bother spending your time doing this? If no, then you got yourself a job that pays the bills and you are doing survival. When you can say yes, you’ve found a passion. Passion means you will throw yourself at this and do what it takes to make this awesome and huge. (If you don’t want huge it’s because whatever you don’t want to be huge, you really don’t want.)
These questions will take some real thought and honesty to set them properly. When you have answered these questions above you next have to begin to prioritize them. Let me show you an example from a reader and what she could do.
The Problem And The Goal
“My goal is to ONCE AND FOR ALL not just over come, but defeat my negative, pessimistic, “I’ve always been a loser” “I’ll always be a quitter” “never be successful” “Never be loveable” (and there’s more) attitude (or alter-ego)!!!! I want to not just “feel”….but KNOW….that I AM worth it! I AM beautiful!! (under all of this fat) And that it’s really OK to be attractive and have people look at you and admire your looks, your body. Who wouldn’t want that? I don’t want to feel ashamed of my body when I go to the public swimming pool with my son. And I don’t want him to feel ashamed or embarassed of how I look, especially when he gets older (He’s just 6 right now).
My number one obstacle is me, myself and I. Making lame excuses as to why I can’t possibly exercise today…..like; “I’m tired”…..”I’m stressed”…..”just five more minutes in bed…”
Whatever it is….I’ll use it! I guess in a way it’s the INSIDE me using it’s negative power to keep me where I’ve always been because I’m so used to just being there and wallowing in that. And change is scary!”
All right. There is a bit of venting there and that’s o.k. But we need to get to the nitty gritty and break it down into something that we can measure and as a result of attaining one goal, the other goals and conquering of obstacles will fall by the way side.
Here is what I would write if I was in her shoes.
Goal: To lose 30 pounds of fat and gain 6 pounds of muscle.
Benefits: Health, attention and energy.
Action: Learn about working out
Buy a self help book on motivation and self-confidence
Get weights at home or buy gym membership
Start with a half hour 3 times a week.
Deadlines: 3.5 months from now
Tools: Local personal trainer for knowledge on weight loss
Library and bookstore for self help books.
Online fitness information
Mp3 audios for motivation in car.
My girlfriend Jane seems to know what she is talking about when it comes to fitness.
Progress: 3 weeks later…I listen to Jane and am not losing any weight and am burned out. Time to see what I can find out online. I’m still sitting on the couch and not taking action because I don’t think it will work. Wait a minute. Maybe it’s a fear of failure that is holding me back. I’m going to do some research
And this is how it works. Setting the overall goal and chipping away at it as you go. Running into obstacles and then seeking out solutions that will put you one step closer to your goal.
This is a great place to mention the motivation factor again. Looking at this, you can see how if achieving the dream is really not that high on the value and priority list, then this is just starting to get too involved to be worth the effort.
There is just way too much that needs to be done that an external source of motivation simply can’t be there all the time. The motivation has to be burning INSIDE. Crackling away, keeping the temperature up so high that energy needs to be vented through action or you’ll explode.